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In the darkest days of my life, I often have to pause and dig deep to realize that life is mine to move through- not mine to let it move me along. We live life by a series of choices that lead to other choices. This can inspire a revitalization of energy and a clearer mind to move again.
I was 18, I was angry, depressed, and blamed stuttering for everything I
thought was going wrong. I settled into the idea that I could do nothing about
my speech. I resigned to allow life to pass me by. The world was better off
I passively reconciled and let life go, which triggered suicidal thoughts daily. However, a speech-language pathologist and a clinical psychologist opened my adolescent eyes to wanting more at the age of 18. To not allow my life to pull me along or push me down. This began my journey of understanding the idea of “agency.”
Agency is the concept that we are the cause of what happens in our life, we are not the effect of life happening on us. Rick Hanson wrote, “With agency, you are active rather than passive, taking initiative and directing your life rather than being swept away.”
Sometimes our lives seem to make no sense. Sometimes sadness can overcome us. Sometimes the loss is overwhelming beyond words. At these moments, we should remind ourselves we affect our lives by the choices we make, which can give us the inspiration to stand up and move.
We can open our eyes to see, despite the suffering we feel that might feel blinding. We can attempt to curl the corners of our lips up ever so slightly to show that sadness and joy can live in the same home, even in the same moment, like a smile.
so many years ago, my adolescent boy self is grateful that a skilled
speech-language pathologist and a clinical psychologist taught me that
educating myself was the best way to take action for a better life.
Taking action was a way to be the agent of my existence. To be active in the decisions, I make to pursue a life based on values. I continued to learn to evolve and grow.
Stand up strong in the waves of life. The water may get choppy, cold, and turbulent. However, when we take ownership of what we want to learn, we can ride the waves to anywhere we wish and allow our dreams to come true. We appreciate you all and all you have to offer the world.
compassion, kindness, and appreciation,
~ Scott Palasik
Photos courtesy of Canva.